the stomachache is always here everytime you cross my mind and the pain is real i wonder whether you miss me or even think about me cause i am every day is like a challenge for me to get up and not think about you to stop wondering what you are up to and not curious for your exciting life there i dont mean i want to know everything but i want you to say this just sometimes oh hey bestfriend,  my life has been good, how is yours? sometimes it is so hard to accept that i might no able to talk you freely again and for that thought, my heart races like i get an attack and then again the stomachache and the tears follow... but then i remember this is the best that we can have so i stop crying and try to breathe in and it happens repeatedly,  at least once in two days i think i just miss the talk so much. 

Dearest my best friend,  (oh can i still call you that? ) How is life doing there? I wish nothing but happiness and joy for you and your family. Today i opened my old laptop and found out some precious pictures from our old encounters. And I got surprised on how much I liked you back then that I did backup our texts from years ago. Silly me. Maybe I knew that this kind of time might come to us.  And I read those texts from years ago. They were silly conversations but I liked it. It was a genuine talk about work, work, and work hehehe. However from those texts, I can tell that you were looking out for me all the time, asking me whether I already arrived in the office or not, making sure that I was safely home at night. Back then, I had you as my backup in every meetings, tasks, and many more. Also, It was so funny reading how you used to call me 'kak'.  That friendship was very pure and beautiful and I love that.  You were once my little brother that I adored so much. Im sorry t